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WARNING: I rant here. If some of it is offensive to you, PLEASE simply unfollow me. Thank you.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Crybaby.

Got this idea from Ashley. Basically my school years:
In elementary school, I was a huge crybaby. No joke. I cried over the littlest things.
Like, a good example is when I was in math class, I'd stare at the board and the teacher and realize that I didn't understand anything that she was talking about. Then, I'd duck my head in the desk and cry uncontrollably. My best friend Angela would pat my back trying to calm me down as nonchalantly as possible. Because, she knew that I didn't want anyone to know that I was crying.
When my mom died, I'd cry all the time, wondering where she went and if she'd ever come back. I was so childish(well, I was only like four). I heard that at my mom's funeral, I was running around playing tag with other kids. The thought of it disgusts me. But that just goes to show how much I really didn't understand what was happening. Then, when I really grasped the meaning of "death", it was basically the end of me. Sort of. I'm still alive,(obviously) but I'm very different.
I remember I used to be much more violent in elementary school. I guess it was because I was always trying to prove myself. Because my self-esteem was so low that I thought that I had to make myself look tough. Anyways, in school, I was always yelling at people. I would always have to write lines from talking a lot in class. I'd always be talking to Angela so, we both got lines. But, I can write really fast albeit messy(inherited from my dad) without getting cramps. So, I'd write my hundred(I will not talk in class while the teacher is talking) lines super fast and then I'd write Angela's. XD
Once, this kid was bothering me so much(poking me) that I pinched his hand so hard that it bled.
Yeah, I was kind of violent. An angry, violent kid.
Now, I'm more mellow. On first glance, people think that I'm a really good girl(I'm always reading, I don't wear makeup, I always do my homework, I get honor roll all the time, etc.). But then, they get to know me and they change their minds. XD My school friends don't see me as a violent person. But, if people push my buttons, I'll break theirs.
o.O

PS: Which I know isn't a good thing. I shouldn't be breaking people. XD

11 run-on sentences.:

haze said...

ohhh... crying is a sign of strength. and i know you are a strong person. haha. i can be very violent sometimes too :)

i like this post/

haze said...

p.s. i'm so sorry about your mom :'(

mayen said...

i enjoyed reading this post. I am also I cry baby even now that i am all grown up. I get a lot of punishment for talking too much in class when I was still studying. I remember one of my teacher attempted to put masking tape on my mouth. it was humiliating.I am sorry to hear about your mom.

anyway, thanks for following me back. Thank you for liking my template. I created that. I worked hard for it. It made me smile when you complemented it. I worked hard all day for that template. :)

The Blog Writer said...

This post says a lot about you. Growth is tough, but it is worth the effort.

You're a strong girl, Jodie-Ann. It is good to know you. It is good.

ishashime said...

i remember i was a huge crybaby, too. and a bit of a loner (or outcast). i always cried privately in the school bathroom and i was always bullied all the time. i didn't act mean and tough, like you did. i just broke down.

i think we learn a lot from our experiences. it makes us what we are today.

apple said...

followed you. bump into your blog through mayen. =)

anyway, lemme just share we're total opposites. was never a crybaby nor violent.

and sorry 'bout your mom. i'm pretty sure she looks after you from heaven.

Fiona said...

I grew up in an all-boy neighborhood, so I was pretty tomboyish.
And I still am.
Instead of staying inside playing with dolls, I would go ride on scooters and fire cap guns. So yeah. That's the story of my childhood life.

And I'm so sorry about your mom. ):
If one of my parents died, I would be devastated and probably never talk again.

Furree Katt said...

it's okay to cry! ♥
the funeral incident only shows how innocent you were. you're a great girl, Jodie.
it's great that you've mellowed out with age :D

iZaynab said...

Oh my my my.
iOnce cried in middle school cause iHad to pay for lunch & iDidn't have money on me one day.
So iWas in like for 20 minutes to get pizza.
Left with no pizza.
iWas so mad x P & iCried.

r.alsharif said...

Crying indicates your alive!
I understand what you mean with if someone pushes you you'd turn violent... I was so close to beating the living CRAP! out of the Benihana staff this weekend!

Jodie-Ann said...

@haze: Aw thank you :)
@mayen: Wow! A teacher tried to put MASKING TAPE on your mouth?! Are they even allowed to do that?! And you're welcome :) It's amazing that you created it! :D I'm happy that I made you smile :)
@TBW: Thank you :)
@ishashime: A agree about learning from our experiences :)
@apple: Thanks for the follow! :D And lucky you XD And thanks, I hope so :)
@Fiona: I was the opposite. I LOVED dolls XD And it's alright, thank you :)
@Furree Katt: :)
@iZaynab: Aw, that sucks. D:
@r.alsharif: Lol, I would have beaten the crap out of them! XD

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